Monthly Archives: October 2013

Maybe it’s the Teenage Boy in Me…Oh Wait, I Don’t Have one of Those.

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I only say this because the first thing I think of when I see the word “ensure” is a drink for the elderly. I guess a teenage boy’s mind would be further in the gutter than that but I am disappointed in myself because I am a writer and I don’t think that is the first thing that should come to mind for a writer…or is it…maybe it is…hmm…

I did not know we had a problem using these words, and I shouldn’t say “we” because I never have. Do people really confuse these words?…Scratch that and replace with- does the New York Times really misuse these words? I found that particularly disturbing, but maybe I should find it comforting. If the New York times still makes mistakes, that makes all of my mistakes forgivable and I am always down with that.

For those of you who do manage to struggle with this one, first of all congratulations! and second- here is the school class link:

http://www.writersdigest.com/online-editor/ensure-vs-insure?et_mid=643296&rid=239109449

T.G.I.F. Thank You Goofy Instagram Fail

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Those were the first four words to come to mind when I typed those letters. But really I am grateful it’s Friday. The brain is mushy canned spinach. It has been one long week of trudging through editing, promoting and marketing and I am, shall we say a bit frayed. Frayed just like a piece of that one material…oh I can’t remember exactly what kind of material it is. It completely loses any sense of continuity once it tears. You know the one, since you are all fabric specialists. 

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Today we are going to discuss refilling the cup, your cup as it were. You can’t write for three weeks staright and never take a break. You know, there probably are people who do. You know there are…because I am one of them. Writer’s, myself included, are usually crazy people and ew often push ourselves to outlandish limits. But any work-a-holic is guilty of this and we all have to refill the cup! I’m thirsty damn it!

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This weekend I am going to go see a movie and see if I can just enjoy the show rather than dissecting the writing the entire time: “Oooh that was brilliant…what?? really that’s the best you could come up with??…aw see? Why can’t I come up with twists like that?…Oh how SWEET! Who wrote this again?…Are you kidding me??

Yes, it’s true I do this. No, it is not because I think I am a superior writer. This is the result of me not taking a break when needed. Can’t even enjoy a movie without turning the “writer” off.

If the smacking sensation of this particular wall sounds (or feels) familiar, stand…step away from the computer and go para sailing. 

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Yes, you must go para sailing. Do you see any other options offered?

 

Why Novel Writing is Not for Math Nerds

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math nerds

I don’t think anyone has any idea how time consuming writing a book is until they have actually attempted to do so, and I don’t just mean throwing a bunch of words on the page, I mean creating a captivating idea and shaping it into something interesting and relatable to human readers. (unless of course you have the privileged opportunity to write for extraterrestrials at which point you will have to go to them for desired reader criteria.)

In my humble writing beginnings a close family member- one close enough to insult me and feel fine about it- asked, “So how many pages have you written?”

“About twenty five.”

He chortled before me. Chortled. “I’d have 300 pages written by now!”

It was a moment where 72 different reactions and emotions run through you all at once…you know…we’ve all had them. Rather than punch him in the face I realized the extreme naiveté of those who have never written a novel. Anyone can throw down 300 pages of crap in no time at all. Writing is an art, a craft. It takes skill. (This family member is a “math” person).

Writing a book can take a few months to do if you are a genius writer- and I do know authors like this. But most writers need many months, sometimes years to really create something readable and enjoyable which is why we devote so much time to it. Dean Koontz writes ten hours a day. Those of us who work jobs independent of writing are up until two and three in the morning hammering out details and creating new ones. But you don’t have to commit this much time to completing a book. It isn’t a race. Make it good. And if you only have one hour a day to devote to it, devote that one hour and keep going. Only you know your schedule. No self abuse allowed!

Remember writing is difficult. Few people who begin ever finish. So work within your own ability and pat yourself on the back- and for heaven’s sake ignore the “math” people!!